


Just Unexpected Baggage.

by Aki-tan (akinikko)



Series: 3 Days of Heaven... Or Hell... Who knows? [3]
Category: D.Gray-man
Genre: Allen is a little shit, And Lavi's reaper, But he is still an arsehole, Imma make that a new character tag, Innuendos and swearing, Kanda can laugh guys, Tyki will be the portaguese baggage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-04
Updated: 2018-06-04
Packaged: 2019-05-15 04:32:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14783648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/akinikko/pseuds/Aki-tan
Summary: Tyki is unexpected baggage for the group, Lavi is dying, and zombies are not the murderers.





	Just Unexpected Baggage.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [wereallmadherealice](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wereallmadherealice/gifts).



> My baegle wanted this and who am I not to commit? ((I don't do enough commitments to her.))
> 
> Here you go the bropool to my bropinder, happy birthday child.

It had been months since the last supply run, and team _suicide squad --_ as they had been dubbed by the safe haven, specifically Allen as Captain Suicidal -- were on an adventure to grab some supplies with the dandy little -- long arse -- shopping list that Komui had given them. Sadly for the group, they had already scavenged the towns and villages nearby and Allen knew eventually they would have to venture further out than usual, to the more deadlier places aka the cities, sooner or later. The Brit knew he was trying to fool himself on the thought that they'd be fine without it all, but who was he kidding apart from himself, because it definitely wasn't his partner and friends in the slightest.

"Nearly there guys, so keep an eye out."

"Ah. Yes the tender go to saying of _keep an eye out_. " Their red haired friend gripped his gun tighter as the single green eye looked at the side mirror of the car. "How bloody quaint."

"Yo Lavi... wanna shove the sarcasm back up your arse?"

"Fuck you Tyki."

"Later."

Their was a groan from the back as Allen rolled his eyes at the couple in the front of the truck as loaded up his sniper, Kanda sat across from him. The albino eyed his partner as the sword user loaded up the pistol.

"Hey. I know you won't need it, but it's just a safety precaution."

"Hn."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Bullshit." He set the sniper to one side and glared at the elder, "Spit it out, before I make you."

"Don't be an idiot like last time. That's all."

"Oh."

Allen lowered his head and Kanda just sighed at him, before nudging his shin with the tip of his boot, getting the snipers attention as grey eyes looked back up at him.

"You know I didn't mean to do it... right?"

"I know. I've been with you the longest." The Asian shrugged and placed his pistol back in its holder under his arm. "You are naturally suicidal. Captain Suicide."

"Not you too? Does everyone know about that?"

"Someone... Not naming names; Lavi."

Kanda turned towards the front of the truck as the red haired spun round to glare at him through the back window, Allen blinked and stared at their friend in betrayal.

"Told everyone."

"Laaavi!!"

"Shut it. I'm sorry 'kay!"

Allen just pouted and looked away before sighing, as Kanda just huffed a small chuckle and then turned to his partner. Before Tyki slammed his foot on the breaks and everyone was practically launched forwards, the two in the back ended almost in a pile of tangled limbs if Kanda hadn't kept a steady grip on the side of the truck.

"Tyki. What the fuck?"

"Twelve o'cock."

"Moyashi."

"Yeah. I'm on it." Allen pulled himself up before looking at the three guns. "Sniper is gonna be too loud..."

"Suppressor?"

"Lowers the range. I'll just use the other one... but it means leaving the truck again."

"Tyki can't you just run it over?"

"What if there is more? Lavi you're smarter than this."

"Okay but sending Allen out alone? Or risking the truck?" Lavi glared towards his boyfriend, "May I remind you he is also our only avaliable sniper?"

"He has a point Tyki."

"Woah... Who says in going alone?"

They all turned to Allen as he held out his hand to Kanda. The Asian blinked before catching on and smirked a little, removing his pistol and handing it the to Brit. They watched as Allen placed silencers on each pistol, before handing Kanda his gun back.

"See. I've got someone watching my back." The albino smiled. "And like he would let me go alone after the last time."

"Damn right... You crazy bastard."

"I always knew you cared, love."

Lavi sighed and nodded, whilst Kanda just growled irritably at Allen, as Tyki stopped the truck. Both got out before pausing, the four of them turned the comms on -- silently praising Reever for being such an awesome tech engineer -- and soon enough one duo, who was somewhat safe in the truck, watched the other duo, who were not so safe, but armed, head towards the direction of the stranded undead being.

《 Be aware. 》

"We know Tyki."

《Just saying kiddo, 'cause like.. If your memory, is anything like your sense of direction. I fear for Kanda. 》

"Go suck a dick."

《 I would... but that's for later. 》

"Gross. Keep it PG."

《 Awe. Kanda, I'm sure Allen will give you som-- 》

A muffled shot was heard through the comms, cutting Tyki off as Lavi watched the figure drop where it stood, before Tyki switched gears on the truck.

《 Safe? 》

"For now... I think."

 

* * *

 

"You know. You'll get yourself killed one day?"

"Ah. Hopefully."

Lavi just gaped at his friend as the albino stalked onwards holding his assult rifle, next to an irritated Kanda, as the Japanese man scrunched his nose up at the flecks of rotting skin on his blade. 

"Yuu." The elder turned to his partner. "Once we get there you can clean the sword okay."

"Whatever."

"Woah why so grouchy... Wander who kicked you out of bed?"

"You. If I remember correctly."

"Tyki's gonna die before me."

"Ya not wrong there, Al."

Allen stopped as they made it to the building. Kanda growled at the broken sign before seeing his partner grin again and Lavi let out a short _Ha_. Behind them, Tyki just sighed before nudging Allen to lead the way again with the butt of his own gun. Carefully, Allen stepped into the building, watching out for stray loose bricks and glass, Kanda followed behind him as Tyki and Lavi went next. The Brit stopped at the self service tills and grimaced with a small shiver as memories of their last encounter at a Tesco store replayed in his head, before being snapping out of it by the swordsman and instantly turning towards Kanda.

"Did... You want to check the warehouse?"

"Hmm. Sure... I guess..." He turned towards Tyki and Lavi, "You guys have a copy of the list right?"

"Yeah..."

"Cool. See what you can find on the shop floor. We're going to check the back."

The two headed off as Lavi nodded and Tyki grinned waving his hand after grabbing a basket, just to call out to them saying something along the lines of _Don't do something I would_ , which just made them both gag because, they both knew what Tyki would do and it was worse that Allen's obsssion with, well that didn't matter.

"Gross."

"Yup. Why do we have to supply run with him." Allen groaned before noticing the shopping cart. "Yo. Trolly. Let's grab it."

"Mhm." Kanda grabbed the cart, settinf his sword inside, before leaning on the handle as he pushed it, Allen behind him. "Also... I think it's because of Lavi."

"Ugh."

《 I can still here you guys! 》

A quiet _shit_ came from the Kanda's end, as Allen flinched at the sudden shout from Lavi, tripping over his foot and crashed into his partner, causing Kanda to stumble releasing the cart as it rolled away to grab the metal shelves to stabiize himself, knocking a few boxes off said shelves, as he grabbed Allen's arm to keep him upright, just for the younger to help when some boxes crashed near them.

"You cocksucking prick! Don't just randomly speak up like that."

《 Ouch, Al... That hurt like the three and a quarter feelings I have. 》

"Moya--"

Allen soon tripped over the stray box in their path, from one of the shelves they fell into and growled, whilst Kanda just stood there unamused and let out the twenty something sigh today.

"Bollocks!"

《 _gasp_ Language mister! 》

"Oh, shut up and go cry me a bloody river, Tyki. You fucking tosser."

《 Also... Go easy on him, Kanda. We need him walking. 》

"Shut up Tyki."

Kanda bit out down comm line, before smirking as he grabbed Allen's arm when the younger tripped over another bloody box, muttering more cusses under his breath, before shrugging off the Asian's grip and continuing to walk to the next aisle with the him, as the swordsman retrieved the cart that ran away during the fiasco beforehand.

He would never admit it unless deemed necessary and only to Allen, but he really did love the Brit. He was entertaining in so many valuable ways, especially when the brat was bickering with Tyki or training with himself or Lenalee, plus of course all those other ways too.

《 You are awfully quiet, Kanda... 》

"Ch. You people do enough talking that would rival a room of thirty... baka usagi."

《 Not that you would even know what it would sound like. You're hardly ever in the mess hall. 》

"I wonder why... Probably because you practically pin the rabbit on the tables in there twenty-four-seven, and shove your tongue down his throat."

《 Awe. You're just jealous. 》

"It's a place for eating, dipshit."

《 That's exactly what I was doing. Eating. 》

《 TYKI! 》

"Tyki meet Mugen. Mugen meet Tyki."

Allen snorted at the angered man's reply towards Tyki, as he paused at the end of the aisle waiting for Kanda. When he reached the sniper, Allen just patted his shoulder, softly smiling as he dumped a few boxes probably of batteries by the looks of the packaging or probably some other useful maybe useless item into the cart, before continuing their search. 

"Now, now, Ladies. No need to remove the jewerly just yet."

《 Quiet child. 》

"I will have you know, that I am nineteen this year, so..."

"Here we go again..."

"Fuck you. Lieutenant Lance--I smoke too much for my own good--alot."

《 Oh right. Lavi, don't forget the smokes. 》

《 You're either gonna die at the hands of Kanda or at the hands of lung cancer before the dead even reaches you. 》

《 Just get the smokes. 》

There was a sigh through the comms, before a small  _ouch_ and a quiet  _fuck_ was heard and both Allen and Kanda looked at eachother, with a sense of dejavu, before shrugging and continuing to see if the warehouse had any of the stuff they needed.

 

* * *

 

Finally meeting up after thoroughly having fun ransacking the warehouse, -- and Kanda pushing Allen in a cart full of stock back to the tills -- plus what they could from the shop floor, the four stared at the tills, one full of food and the other with small electronic items. Tyki instantly turned and gave the two from the warehouse run, a really confused look before Allen sighed, pouting at the man.

"I don't know about you... But I wanna know if Reever can make a decent fan or at least get that buildings air con working again. I feel like I'm suffocating ninety percent of the time."

"Same here."

"I miss the old miserable England. It was easier to rant about."

"Agreed."

Kanda and Tyki looked at each other before shrugging, not quite understanding since one grew up in a secured hospital facility and the other in Portugal. The four began packing the backpacks up, one each, all taking a portion of the items fairly, and whatever didn't fit they'd comeback for another time. Hopefully it would still be there, after all they're probably not the only safe haven around.

 

* * *

 

 

After Tyki had packed his, the Portuguese driver sat down, pulling out the pack of smokes from his pocket, taking one out and then setting it on the side, and as soon as he did, a crackling sound started up, and both Kanda and Allen froze recognizing the sound. Both had muttered quietly;  _lord save us_ with a groan, befpre turning to face their friend and glared at the dirty yet glowing screen behind Tyki.

""Not again... God Dammit Tyki..."

The tanned male soon lifted his head and blinked at his friends, when they cursed him together. Confused as he had a lighter raised to the cigarette held between his lips loosely, frowning before Lavi joined the conversation after packing his bag up as well.

"Is that what I think it is?"

"Self service till?" Allen turned to the red haired and snarled a little. "Yes. Yes it is."

_' W-wel-welcome to Tes-- Unexp-- do-do-- Cl-club Ca-ca-ca-card. '_

"And your boy toy just woke it up."

"With his ugly fucking arse."

"Oi, you little shit!"

"What?" Allen glared at Tyki with a tight lipped smile. "I was always told to tell the truth."

"Dick."

_' pl-pl-ple-please re-re-- i-ite-item remo-- con-- '_

"Yes I have one. Thank you for remembering."

Allen went back to packing his bag, as Kanda stared at the machine With Lavi, both confused a little at what it was trying to say. The Brit turned to his friends as he zipped up the last two backpacks, then towards Tyki.

"What wrong?"

"It's weird. It's like it's trying to say something but can't get it all out."

_' P-Please take-- i-item-tem in b-- y-y-your re-re-receipt-- '_

"It's fucking annoying, that's what it is." Kanda growled and grabbed his blade from the stray cart near them. "Move so I can fucking end it, before it causes trouble."

"Wait. Let's here it out."

"Fuck you Moyashi. I'm not repeating three months ago!"

"If you keep shouting like that, you won't even need the fucking machine."

_' D-D-Don-t for-- y-yo-your ch-ch-change espe-specia-- no-notes '_

"'Ch. Fuck off."

"Good boy."

Allen patted the Asian's head mockingly, just to have his wrist grabbed and becoming trapped between Kanda and the till. Lavi snorted at the action, as Tyki just sighed and took a drag of his cigarette.

"You should know, he likes it when you're rough, Kanda."

_' b-ba-b-bagg-ga-gage are-rea-a-- b-befo-ore-re co-con-continu-in-ing-- '_

"Of course he does." Kanda grabbed the snipers hoodie, well his hoodie. "It's why he is doing it." Allen smiled at Kanda as the latter growled. "Right, babe."

"Stop calling me that, fucking Moyashi!"

The other two had realised Kanda's grip tightening as Tyki shifted a little where he was sitting and glanced at Lavi, the other young adult just sighed and set his bag on the floor, before going to split the two up.

"Maa. Guys cool it 'kay. Fight between one another later on back home."

"Fine. You heard the rabbit, Bakanda."

"You're all idiots."

_' Un-un-unexpected-ted i-item-tem-- p-p-pl-ple-ease-se re-remove-- con-tin-tinuing-ing-- '_

 "Oh... I figured out what its trying to say."

_' Un-Un-Unexpecte-te-ted-ed item-tem in b-b-ba-bag-bagging are-ea-a-- '_

"Tyki... is..."

_' Pl-plea-ase r-r-re-remove-ve be-b-b-b-before-ore con-tin-tinuing-ng-- '_

"Roadkill..."

Allen grinned at the adult as a short snort one of the three, Kanda looked towards Lavi as the rabbit bit the inside of his cheek, whilst Allen rattled on.

"Tyki is just baggage weighing us down."

_' Pl-Plea-Please re-rem-remove-- item in ba-bag-ging-ing-- '_

"Hey!"

"Uhm... well..."

Tyki stood up and glare at the three as Lavi just broke, and released a full hearted laugh at the machine calling his boyfriend useless baggage that they didn't need anymore. The red-haired knew this would be bad for him later but he just couldn't hold back the laughter anymore. The Asian also looked in a different direction as he snorted at the assumption before quietly chuckling to himself, and Allen, he was just soaking this all up like a sponge. Tyki's reaction, Lavi and Kanda's amusement. All of it as he stood there with an innocent but smug smile, hands in his hoodie pockets, gun and backpack slung over his shoulder, leaning against the till, legs crossed over one another.

_' In-in-inser-ert cash or t-to-touch p-p-pay with ca-ca-card-- '_

"Boy. I will kill you."

"Hun, I'll be gladly waiting."

"Also Lavi. Go fuck yourself."

"Tyki... babe... wait up." Lavi went to chase after Tyki, tripping again over the other tills, as the elder made his way to the exit. "Pfft, oh my God I think I got a stitch... wait... Jesus."

"He is so going to get wrecked later for laughing."

"Fucking rabbits."

Allen turned to Kanda, as the Japanese man looked at him, just to see the Brit just gestured to the till. The swordsman grinned and took great joy in shutting the checkout up, whilst grey eyes clouded over in a daze. Allen watched Kanda use his precious katana, and began to shut each till up, before snapping back to reality and grabbing the last two bags and made his way to the entrance before waiting for his partner as Kanda made sure none of those godforsaken machines turned on again.

The muffled calls of Tyki's name from Lavi made the albino chuckle as Kanda just silently walked beside him as they stalked after the duo to the truck just a little away from the shop. Since they had already had a battle with the dead heading for the shop, there wasn't much on the way back except a few strays, which were taken care off, silently and swiftly so they could make there way home although for a city in an apocolypse, it was awefully silent and a pretty empty place. It was unnerving to the highest amplitude.

**Author's Note:**

> This was basically a carry on from [How to know you're still in England.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14626530)


End file.
